Connections

Long before I met Kevin, I used to drive home from Church the long way. Why? I have no idea. I just loved to come home that way. A year or so later, I stopped doing that. Again....why? No clue. But, I started taking my cat (who was very sick) to the vet. Again....I went the long way. After I met Kevin, he told me he used to live on the road I took home from Church, but had moved into town. You guessed it. Onto the road that I took to the vet's office every day. Coincidence? Who knows.

When you get into the China adoption process, you constantly hear the Red Thread Story. The story is originally about lovers destined to meet, but it has evolved into a story about people (parents and children) destined to meet. About 2 weeks ago, I was browsing around one of my many Yahoo groups and decided to open an agency's photo album. There smiling back at me was a darling little girl. Her special need was much more than we had considered, but that smirk on her face made us curious. We requested her file. The next day my Mom happened to be staying over night and we showed her the photos. She noticed that this child's file was released on Aug. 14th. The day my Dad died. I hadn't noticed that. Within a couple days, I found myself on the phone with a Dr. who reviews files for adoptive familes. She is amazing, but gives the worst case scenario. I was scared. This child has too many potential issues. We can't do it. I can't. I cried on Kevin's shoulder and he told me he was glad I was scared because I should be. It is scary stuff. It would be totally unlike me to not be scared. True. Remember our honeymoon? Or the last time we went to China? So....I kind of told myself that this wasn't our child. She has too big of a diagnosis. Too many unknowns. Kevin said we needed to pray and ask God to tell us what He wants us to do. The following night I was reading a blog that I follow and she posted this:

Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been told you from the beginning? Have you not understood since the earth was founded? He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth, and its people are like grasshoppers. He stretches out the heavens like a canopy, and spreads them out like a tent to live in. He brings princes to naught and reduces the rulers of this world to nothing. No sooner are they planted, no sooner are they sown, no sooner do they take root in the ground, than he blows on them and they wither and a whirlwind sweeps them away like chaff.
“To whom will you compare me? Or who is my equal?” says the Holy One. Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one and calls forth each of them by name. Because of his great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing.
Why do you complain, Jacob? Why do you say, Israel,“My way is hidden from the LORD; my cause is disregarded by my God”? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God,the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary,and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary,and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles;they will run and not grow weary,they will walk and not be faint.
Isaiah 40:21-31

I started to cry. This little girl has Spina Bifida. She can walk, but that could change. It's a big unknown. One of my big concerns was that we walk everywhere. We walk every night during the summer. We have stairs in our house. There is no way around that. How woud a child with some of the challenges Spina Bifida comes with handle all that? How would we? And then God sent me a little note. No worries. He has a plan. So, I knew....this was our girl. Still there was insurance to be looked into. She may need lots of surgeries as she grows. Or she may need none. Another big unknown. So, Kevin looked into that. No problems there. Another door opened. Last night, as I browsed thru yet another Yahoo group, someone had posted about there being a possibility of the Adoption Tax credit being reinstated. WHAT? Seriously? You should have seen Kevin's face! Our little girl's birthday? April 15...............connection? Red Thread???? Coincidence?? God????